With all of the noise in the world and our ever increasingly busy lives, it is so easy to feel lost or constantly behind. Relentless demands of our time and being available 24/7 has left many exhausted and worn out. I see it in the faces of the commuters on their way home from work and in the tired eyes of parents I see at the grocery store. I hear it from the employees that attend the training sessions I lead. I also sometimes see the same look reflected back at me and it stops me in my tracks.
It is Spring in the Midwest and when I looked out my window today, the ground was covered in snow. The weather seems unpredictable and even violent. Storms and wind usher in the new season and it reminds me that transformation and change in our lives looks the same way: it’s messy, and much like the weather, our internal environment, whether it’s personal or organizational, can appear just as turbulent. In fact, it’s almost always so.
Which brings me to the topic of the post: knowing where your center is. Years ago a participant in a retreat I led shared a metaphor that she used. She told us how the ocean floor is calm during a hurricane even as the waves, wind, and rain toss anything on its surface. She said she uses this image whenever she is dealing with something that unsettles her. I have always kept that in my mind, though I don’t always remember to use it until I consciously think about it.
Every class I teach on leadership includes a section on self-care. I often get lackluster responses and even more often the conversation moves into how leaders can’t take care of themselves because they’re so busy taking care of everything and everyone else. While this has historically been a female or feminine issue, the men I meet are suffering just as much.
It is also the case where no one thinks it is going to happen to them and then it happens. Having a plan for how to care for yourself and finding your center is so important before the storm starts.
Some ways to get started include:
- Reading how other leaders take care of themselves
- Look to the activities you enjoy doing- not because you have to but because you want to- then be sure to do them on a regular basis.
- Review the people you surround yourself with- who are the ones you like to be around and who are the ones you dread seeing? Make a point to surround yourself with people who make you feel good.
- Use a structure like coaching, yoga, or some other mindful practice to help you get grounded when you begin to feel your feet leave the ground.
You can also begin by reaching for material that can help you design ways to practice better self-care in your life. Some of the techniques are simple: changing your perspective, setting an alarm throughout the day to remember to breathe for a few minutes, or even taking your laptop and working in a different space. Other techniques take longer: reflecting on switching jobs, finding work you love to do, or having a difficult conversation with someone you’ve been avoiding.
At Living Forward, we provide several solutions to help you get started. This month we’re featuring on-demand webinars that fit your lifestyle. You listen to them when you’re able and you can try the different techniques that make the most sense for you. If you’re looking for ways to transform fear, then the series on transforming fear is for you. Eve Siegel, a friend, author, and coach I know, provides several great ways for you to transform fear- whatever your fear is about- into action that can produces positive results and help you find your center.
The other option is to begin looking at your current situation and finding ways to make simple changes that promote more energy, and consequently more time, in your work or life. Managing your energy vs time, also includes a 10-page booklet with several techniques to get you started and bring you back to your center so that when the storm hits, you’re like the ocean floor: calm.
We will continue to add to our library of webinars on topics that matter to your whole life, whether that is in the workplace, or in your personal life. The best scenarios are when we feel free to bring our whole selves into everything we do. There is tremendous energy and freedom in that. If there is something in particular that you would like to see, please let us know. We care about what’s important to you.